YESTERDAY AND NOW TOMORROW

Les wonders about the future of our villages.

Yes I enjoyed reading the 30th Anniversary Edition of our Village Pump and the congratulations which were offered to a number of people were fully justified. So many people had done so much over the years, well done.

Now however it’s back to the future and I read the article by Mr. Grumpy with interest. But I wondered if he really got to the heart of the matter. It appears that a long standing Councillor, I suspect a man, stormed out of a Parish Meeting and resigned. Apparently the clock had struck 9pm. Well being a bit of a know-all I think there may well have been more to it than that. Could it possibly have been the case that the dear man, and I still think it was a man, had been at this Meeting maybe for some couple of hours listening to such dross that it nearly drove him to distraction making him wish he had spent the time taking the delectable Miss Jones to the pictures even if that meant he had to take his Wife along as well?

Then Mr. Grumpy told us the saga of another Councillor. Again, I suspect a man, and I’m sure I know his name. (I told you I was a know-all) Apparently he hardly appears at Meetings. So what can we make of all of this? Quite simply that there is generally very little wrong with people but there is with the” System”. Parish Councils have had their day and reform is over-due; I covered all of this in my article in the September Issue. Why does our Councillor friend hardly turn up at Parish Meetings? Because he knows, as I do, that most of the time it’s a waste of time; it’s that simple.

I remember years ago, (oh my God) when I found myself on the only Committee I have ever been on. There was I, then a young man, surrounded by a bunch of old fogies who bored the pants off me. The only way I retained my sanity was to sit there and admire the gorgeous legs of our young Female Secretary. (Mr. Editor, do you mind if I pause here for a glass of water, I feel almost overcome)

So where does all of this leave us? What of the future of our Villages? Well I fear for the future. One day at Stoke Ferry, Grampian Foods will be a memory and in their place will be just houses. With a bit of luck there might even be people living in them. But we shall never be sure because will we ever see anyone? Stoke Ferry, like so many of our Village, will have become just Dormitories, where people leave in the mornings to travel to work and return in the evenings to sleep. Yes you will have the odd village function but to me a few swallows don’t make a summer.

After all of that I feel I must finish on a happier note so I must tell you the story of a very attractive blond who went in to a Library and said, “May I have a Burger and Chips” to which the Librarian replied, “I’m sorry but this is a Library” to which the still very attractive blond WHISPERED “May I have a Burger and Chips”.

I don’t care what you think, I think that’s brilliant.

Methwold.

Les Lawrence

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