River Wissey Lovell Fuller

More Silly, But True, Signs

August 2004

Graham unearths more silly, but true, signs!

We can repair anything (please knock hard as the bell doesn't work.

Seen on Repair Shop door

Sheep 15 mph Seen on farmers gate

Toilet out of order. Please use floor below

Seen in a toilet in a London office block

Open seven days a week (except Mondays)

Sign in New York restaurant

Wanted: ejection seat tester: involves a small amount of travelling.

Job advert in an employment agency

No children allowed.

Seen in US maternity ward

Wanted: unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night.

Seen on farm notice-board

For indoor or outdoor use only.

On a label of Chinese made Christmas lights.

Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for efficient beating.

Sign in kitchen supplies shop

Have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home.

Seen in a jewellery shop

Due to increasing problems with litter louts and vandals, we must ask anyone with relatives buried in the graveyard to do their best to keep them in order,

Notice distributed by a Wiltshire vicar

Graham Forster

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